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30 October 2014

That orange tape measure

There was that dream where I had an orange tape measure and I liked going around measuring the property lines of neighbors' yards and then telling them the results and it was surprising that Wes Craven cared so much about a 3/4" difference on the south side of his front yard, and it was even more surprising that I didn't think it was weird that Wes Craven was my neighbor but I went ahead and measured the boat dock out back where those teenagers disappeared last summer and Wes told me not to tell anyone but he said the teenagers were dead because they had sex.