I've always wanted to have an English accent because maybe then people would think I was smart or interesting. Trouble is, I hear if you're going to spontaneously adopt a new accent, Brummie is not a good choice.
Which is too bad because the word Brummie sounds so Brittsh and I like to say it with every bit of affectation available inside my mouth.
Brummie. Brummie. Brummie.
Imagine that the sound of my voice as I say this is a sweet mix of Charles Dickens' Oliver asking for more and Dick Van Dyke on his way to what should have been an Oscar nomination. That's what it sounds like when I say Brummie.
Top of the mornin', Govna. And all that rot. Excuse me while I pop on the tele and watch some BBC.
If I had a Brummie accent . . . eh.