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21 August 2013

Daily Ambivalence - bacon

Bacon smells.

Good, bacon smells good, but bacon smells.

If I was an international spy, I would never eat bacon because it would be impossible to sneak up on unsuspecting guards at secret facilities.

Mmmm, bacon
Of course, later that night when I was seducing my arch enemy's girlfriend, maybe I would want to smell like bacon. Her take on American breakfasts would be the deciding factor. There seems to be a trend among femme fatales towards veganism these days, so who knows?

Being an international spy is tricky enough. I think worrying about how I smell is one-element-too-many to worry about.

Unless we're talking about a nice pancetta. That goes without saying.

Or a thick-sliced dry rub.

Or applewood.

Or hickory smoked.

Or peppered.

Heck, even turkey bacon.

Come to think of it, I smell like bacon right now.