Daily Ambivalence - the man with the bushy mustache said I should meet him by the fern

Or maybe he just said "by Fern."

This puts me in kind of a dangerous position. Did the guy mean to meet him by a plant or a person? If a person, is that any person named Fern or am I supposed to look for the person named Fern. Is there anyone in the world who has attained one-name status like Weird Al or Hulk, but their name is Fern?

I wish the guy with the bushy mustache had just said to meet at McDonalds. I wouldn't know which one, of course, but then at least I could order a McBitchin.

The man with the bushy mustache said I should meet him by the fern . . . eh.